Writing From the Inside

Shoot Out the Lights by whereupon.

Slash.

There’s no plot to this, no dialog, no structure, but man. The imagry. The character voices. The angst shoots out of this like rockets.

Here’s a tidbit:

“Because Sam’s jeans are low on his hips and the headlights are the only artificial light in sight. Cracked wet asphalt glitters like razors in the weeds. Dean runs a quick hand across his car and his smile is like shrapnel and then they get inside and Sam has never seen Dean broken, but he thinks it would look something like this. His head ringing with adrenaline. The sound of fear. His eyes stained with anger.

And Dean’s hands tighten around the steering wheel and he says, you know.”

You know what? What the hell is the writer talking about? I don’t know. I just know it hits me, somewhere deep inside.

Sharing a Room with His Brother by Roxie Ann.

Slash.

This one made me laugh from the start, because Sam is so annoying when Dean is trying to sleep. It was this:

“Dean crept into bed, years of experience and experiences (all bad) prompting him not to jostle and wake the person lying next to him. Though he highly doubted that Sam was asleep in the first place. He had to wonder if Sam ever slept. Or if Sam just pretended to because that was what they did. But tonight Dean was going to have hope. That Sam was as exhausted as he was and that they would both sleep through the night – peacefully even.

He should have trusted his gut instinct, because Sam hadn’t been asleep. As soon as Dean’s head hit his pillow, Sam’s eyes opened. And so did his mouth.

“We’ll have to get up at 7 if we’re going to be in New Mexico by the end of the day.”

This is so Sam. The rest of the story follows suit, but nothing is as strong as this opening.  

Out of Focus by shadow-shimmer.

Slash.

Want to smoke now. That is all. (Okay, it’s not. This story is so in character is scary. Dean is right on, the boys are having troubles, they argue, and the arguing turns to you know what. But they never drop character.)

Not By Half by Estrella30.

Slash.

Found something good here. Dean thinks about all the women he’s loved over the years, or cared for, or just had sex with. How each one means less and less to him as time goes by. Each section starts out with a phrase like:

“When Dean was sixteen he met Suzanne.”

The section goes on to talk about Suzanne, or whoever she is this time. Then the last section starts:

“When Dean was twenty-six he found Sam.” Then it continues on with how they met up again and how the sex starts. What I like about this story is how Dean realizes he was wandering without finding, and how it’s only ever been Sam for him. Unlikely yes, but nicely done.   

Lead Us Not Into Temptation by joyfulgirl41

Slash.

Oh. I don’t want to admit it, I really don’t, but when I finished this one, a shiver ran up my spine. You know, like in the stories? Like fingers. Like a mouse had run up me. Ficlets should not have the power to do this, they really shouldn’t. It’s a story about temptation and the point when temptation becomes a choice you cannot deny. Kudos to this writer, I thought I was too jaded for a reaction like that.

In the Stillness by Amiss.

Slash.

Short, too short. It makes me sigh. Why are all these stories so short? Still, this one is nice, with another little nugget here. Dean as caregiver, giving to Sam who is lonely. Sam cannot resist because he is so lonely, misses Jess so.

It’s basically summed up by this:

“He tried to stop this the first time, and the second, but when he’s honest he knows that he didn’t try very hard, really, because Dean’s warm and he loves him and Sam’s always so fucking cold lately.”

Poor Sammy.

Landmarks by estrella30.

Slash.

Not a real story, more of a ficlet, but containing a gem of an idea, that of memory as geography. Some people know dates and names, but Dean tells his story by where he’s been and what he did there. Whereas Sam knows Route 40 in Tulsa, or wherever. The way people remember things isn’t good or bad, per se, but it does say something about them. I liked this idea here, had done a paper on it for Linguistics, about people’s ways of telling direction, or marking events. I once, way back, as a delivery gal, worked with this guy who told directions by Dairy Queens. Go up through Ft. Collins, he’d say, and take a right at the Dairy Queen. Or, go two miles past the Dairy Queen right outside of town, then go left. This is what started me off on my linguistics journey. He didn’t realize he was doing it and seemed quite shocked when I pointed it out to him. (Turns out he was chowing down on Blizzards at every stop.) So I kept it going, giving my directions by the various McDonalds. It was the summer of the 99 cent Big Mac, and being a Big Mac fan (back then) I did a lot of stopping myself. It was a great summer, which is probably why I liked this ficlet!

We Were Like Family Once by dodger-winslow.

Gen

Oh jeeze. Oh jeeze. Oh jeeze. A REAL story. With words and everything. Just kills me. A plot. Solid structure. Single POV. Structure. Good. Well written. Well plotted. John. John Winchester and Bill Harvelle. John’s side of the story as to just how Bill got killed and why. Why his boys never met Ellen till years later. Totally believable, reads like cannon. Like an Ep. A really long ep. The thing clocks in at nearly 30,000 words and while some of it slumps in the middle (some of the converations are really long) what I loved was the realism and care that the writer has with John’s character. And those of his sons, seen through John’s eyes. The conversations he has with them and why. How he sees them. It all rings so true.

In my mind this is how it happened until Kripke tells me different.

Turn the Page by gilascave.

Gen.

What an odd little story. Some of it I liked, some of it I didn’t. Never understand why so many writers insist on giving Dean kids scattered all over the place, like his daddy never taught him how to be careful. What was great in this story was how Sam was. He was a great character here, honest and pissed off and kicking Dean awake so that Dean can do his share in making the motel room safe. Just what Dean would do to him. That was it. Such a weird little story. Not badly written, just weird.

Outside by the Blue, Blue Moon by vaingirlfic.

Slash.

Lo, I have found one of the stories I was looking for. A terrific read, and an amazing job making a fairy tale come to life. Only I’m not sure which fairy tale, it just reads like its based on one. Sam is captured by this demon who insists that Sam stay with him. If Sam does not do so willingly for a month, the demon will kill Dean and Dad. Sam watches his brother and father through the window and agrees. A spell has been cast. Sam must stay for a month, he can never tell anyone, and the horrible horrible spell that has been cast over him can only be broken by someone who loves him. So.

Brilliant. My favorite part is where Dean (natch) is the one who figures it out, not just the spell but how to break it. He relaxes against Sam and says, “I can fix that.” You know. Just like the guy in the movie Holes who grows those terrific onions. “I can fix that.” Well, mabye that’s not exactly what he says, it’s somethnig more along the lines of, “Heck, that’s easy.” There’s a lot of love there between brothers, and I just want to go soak in a whole tubfull of it.